4 month update!

Natalie Grace,
You turned four months old on the 18th of July! Where has the time gone? You are looking less and less like an infant and are quickly on your way to being a little girl. That's how I see it, anyways...

Well, let's see if I can recall all of your stats because you are now on your way to being almost five months old, and Mommy's a little behind!

At your four month checkup, you weighed 15.8 lbs and were 25 inches long! That means you're 2'1"! You were so bright-eyed when we walked into the office, but you grew tired of everything after you were laid down on the scale to be weighed. When we brought you back into the room, you cried (screamed) the entire time. I was so glad that Daddy was with us. Just so you know, he has been to every single one of your doctor visits. What a good Daddy to not leave his girls alone! Unfortunately, you cried throughout the entire visit, even when Dr. Lett came into the room and tried to get you to smile. I lost my hearing while trying to ask her questions and talk over you, and the pacifier was giving you no relief whatsoever. You cried harder after your vaccines and eventually cried yourself out. You were already asleep when we took you back into the car. Afterwards, though, you woke up happy and alert at Cracker Barrel and talked to us the entire time.

Bedtime: You are sleeping through the night most days of the week, but you are kind of teething, so you're waking up more that you normally would. Or you could be in the middle of a growth spurt. We have moved your crib into the room since you have outgrown your incline sleeper, but you usually sleep the last few hours of the night in our bed. You don't like to be swaddled and contained, but you sure love to be nestled close with us! Your favorite thing to do now while sleeping is pull something soft over your eyes and cheeks and drift off. Mommy's too nervous to put you in your nursery. I know it sounds silly, but I like you just where you are. You're my buddy.

Meals: Traditionally, this is the month where we would start you out on solid food, but we are waiting til the six month mark per advice of our doctor. You show an interest in what we're eating, though, and have grabbed the spoon out of my cereal a couple of times. I think you're eager to learn or just eager to put something new in your mouth. Bottles, hands, teethers, and pacifiers can probably get kind of boring. You are now drinking 6 oz of formula every three hours. We are having a hard time spacing out your feedings more than that because you get MAD if you go any longer without a bottle and 5 oz just won't cut it anymore! You watch us like a hawk if you see us with your bottle or mixing your formula. You know what's coming and you cannot contain yourself!

Playtime: You are a wiggle worm. You are now rolling on to your tummy and having the best time grabbing at all of your little stuffed animal friends. You get super excited when we bring out Minnie Mouse. ;) This month we bought you an infant seat to help you with your sitting. I don't know how well you're taking to it yet. You enjoy the outside very much and calm down instantly if you're fussy when we take you outside. Grandmommy(my mom) has a wrap-around porch, and the two of you are always outside or on the swing at her house. She made you belly laugh, but I haven't seen you do it! You've also been on the four wheeler and lawn mower with your Pa (my dad) already. Don't worry, though, it was on the slowest setting. Okay, so you loved it, but Mommy worried. At your Nannie and Grandpoppy's house, you are having fun watching the fishies in their pond. Nannie sings a silly song to you every time you go over there, and you seem to like it.

Clothing/Diapers: You are between 3-9 month old clothing, depending on the brand. You are so long that you have to wear these sizes. I am actually having to shop for you now instead of going through all of your gifted outfits. :) It's fun, but baby clothes are pricey! You're like mama, though, and get your stuff from the clearance rack or on consignment! You are a size 2 in diapers, and I've started buying those at Essex Retail outlet since it's only $20 for a box of 200 or so. In diaper-speak, that's a good deal! I hate to think how expensive diapers will be by the time you have your own babies!
Oh, this month also marks your first "POOPSPLOSION" in public. Let's just say the car was very close quarters as we tried to hurry home to bathe you. You were a stinky girl, and Mommy smelled like it, too! Yuck!
Mommy and Daddy love you more and more each day. You are such a blessing to us, and we can't believe God gave you to us. :)

Turning Point ~Prayer Request

Okay, I am going to pull myself out of the rut here. I have been dwelling in a pit for far too long and need to show my gratitude for a couple of things every now and then instead of focusing on the negative. I tend to get a bit perfectionistic every other week or so and go on a complete self-loathing rampage that assaults my thought life and spills over into my actions. Life is just too short for that. Amen? Amen.

What was the turning point? Well, I was informed last night by my cousin ( an in-home nurse) about a little girl who is only a month older than Natalie who is not doing so well. Her mother's pregnancy was perfectly normal, nothing to be concerned about, but two hours after the baby was born, the little girl began to have violent seizures. Her home was the NICU for almost three months. She is now five months old and has returned to the hospital twice. They refer to it as malignant epilepsy. The family has had to call in hospice. Can you imagine? I asked my cousin the names of the parents, and I think I went to high school with the baby's father. If I did, he was a couple years under me so I didn't really know him. I searched his name on facebook and saw pictures of this precious child hooked up to monitors and LOST IT. I'm tearing up remembering it. My hand flew to the computer screen and I prayed over this baby for a miracle. And then I took inventory of my blessings: the job I don't always love, the husband I rarely thank who still loves me no matter what, the beautiful house that isn't always perfectly clean,the healthy, beautiful, contented baby of ours, cars that run, health insurance, loving friends and family. All of this stuff-- it gets lost in the mix of "if only we had this..." and "if I have to ask you to change the cat litter one more time..." and "WHY AM I SUCH A FATTY MCBUTTERPANTS?"



Really, Jami? Those things I can change.

Some family just had to call in hospice. And I know we can't always be perfect in our practice of gratitude or even fathom what God has done for us, but would it kill us to try and remember once in a while?

Please pray for this family, too, by the way. I know they are seriously hurting. Pray for a miracle. Pray that the seizures would go away. Parents should not have to bury their babies. This little girl belongs in Heaven because she IS an angel, but I pray that her parents can enjoy her for a lifetime. Please pray that they know Jesus. Please give the mother peace. I know the father needs it, too. Deeply. Desperately. A mother's love is different, though. Not more, but different. Nine months of cherishing a baby inside of you. A love that keeps you up all through the night. Please pray. I think their last name is Underwood, but I am unsure.

Thank you.

life life life

First and foremost, I am so glad that I don't actively promote my blog. I know that my blog is public if anyone ever accidentally stumbles on it, but I would hate to think that people tune in here on their reader or remote device just for giggles. Other than my updates on Natalie, this place can be downright depressing! I had aspirations of one day being a crafty mom-blogger, but that phase of life will just have to wait. Besides, I find that there are way too many of those!! It's hard to keep up, and then it's a popularity contest or competition, and I'm just not into that.
Anyhow, what's new our way? Well, we've had quite the week here. On Monday, Brandon and I celebrated five years of wedded bliss (woo!). We didn't really have any plans in mind, so we set about driving into Hendersonville to see if we could find anything to do. There were some shops, but nothing really caught our interest. We went into Barnes and Noble, dreamed about having the money to buy a lot of books, and then drove over to a place called Tilted Kilt for a casual anniversary dinner. When we walked through the door, the hostess was wearing a mini-skirt (plaid) and a baby's shirt. Brandon promptly stammered that Tilted Kilt was not the place for us and we awkwardly excused ourselves. We drove around Hendersonville for a little bit more, going down random roads and checking out the lakefront properties and all the awesome mansions. We had heart attacks at the listing prices and morosely drove back into Lebanon, wondering what in the world there was to do on our anniversary, a national holiday, besides crashing backyard barbeques. We finally settled on getting back on the interstate and driving into Mt. Juliet, unaware of the big fireworks show that was to be put on. When Providence was too busy for both our tastes, we settled on China Buffet. Needless to say, that adequately fits where we are in our lives. The anniversary tradition has gone downhill! We decided to celebrate our anniversary the weekend after next year. :)

On Tuesday/Wednesday Natalie came down with her first cold. I freaked out. I stayed up all night with her and sucked boogers out of her nose; I ran the hot shower in our bathroom and sat on the toilet giving her a bottle and hoping the steam would alleviate her. I squirted saline up her nose and waited for it to do its magic, and at 5:00am, I made a call to my boss telling him that I wouldn't be in until later. I called the pediatrician's office and was told that everything I was doing was right and that I shouldn't probably bring her in unless she had a fever. I dropped her off at my mom's, went to work, got up and went to work the next day and had gotten the same crud she came down with, only more severe!

I went into work both days, but ended up leaving early. I finally got some good medicine yesterday that helped me to sleep off the effects. My mom and mom-in-law were gracious enough to keep Natalie fed, changed, and loved on until I was myself again. It felt like an eternity, and I was sanitizing everything. I didn't want to touch Natalie, so I just looked at her from across the room and missed her. Oh, I also threw up on myself and my car...lovely. :( I now drive the Vomit-mobile. It's cleaned up now and not so bad as it could have been! Thank goodness I was not on the interstate; I would have caused a wreck.

So, now...I think we're back in business!! I still don't feel well, but I am at least well enough to function again. And Natalie is good, stuffy, but good. :)

And the work is never done; I have pee-infested couch cushions on our deck that need a good cleaning in baking soda. Kids, pets...argh... life. But it was good to breathe for a few hours, even if it was a Nyquil-induced coma that saved me from going under!!

.....one of those days, moods, whatever.

New mother neurosis... that's what I have. I figure I'd do a quick update on here just for the sake of updating and filling in the last ten or so minutes of my lunch break. I've been feeling a bit down lately; at first, I called it the "baby blues", but now I'm moving on to something more serious, perhaps a little postpartum depression. It's no fun. Hormones are swinging high and low, and some days I feel like crying no matter what I'm doing! I could be having a GREAT day, but the tears will catch up to me sooner or later. It could very well be my birth control pills, though, so I have officially weaned myself off of them and am going to consult with my doctor to find a new method next week. I don't feel like throwing myself into a wall anymore, but I'm still a bit down and not quite where I would like to be. I've been taking fish oil capsules and need to try working out more. And by more, I mean I need to actually do it.



Natalie is doing well, though. She's being shared between her two grandmothers during the week while I and Brandon are away at work. It's bearable, but there are days where I just miss the crud out of her and want to check in on her every five seconds. She has learned how to roll over, giggle ( got the phone call for that one today), and now she's having a little bit of a runny nose. The runny nose scares me because I am terrified of her getting sick and not knowing what to do, but it's gotta happen sooner or later.

Anyhow, we're alive. Blogging is definitely not my top priority these days, so I just wanted to throw my two cents out into the blogosphere. :) Please pray for me if you're the praying sort.