random mishmash

I don't know what it is, but I'm not super excited about Christmas this year. I'm not bluesy or anything, but it just seems rushed, and I think I'm so much looking forward to next year's Christmas that this one is passing in a blur. In truth, I'm just counting the days until the end of March.

So, anyhow. . . on a completely unrelated note, I stepped on the scale tonight and I am down 5 lbs from my last doctor's visit. I was fully clothed, so I think it was just Thanksgiving dinner that hung around for my prenatal visit and not me actually gaining more weight than I was supposed to. This makes me very happy, but I am wondering if I should be losing weight at all at this point? The doctor told me to avoid fast foods, sweets, and to do a lot of walking for the remainder of the pregnancy. Okay, so I cut most of that out for a week, and I'm down. I guess it was the mental shift from thinking pregnancy was an excuse to cram my face to actually seeking out alternatives to chicken nuggets and cookies. It's the Christmas season, so it is a little difficult to avoid sweets. They're, like, everywhere. I do sneak them in, though. :)

Anyhow, I finished my Christmas tree tonight. I'm not too proud of it, so I think I'll skip the pictures this year. It's just a little scrawny, and I didn't feel like pouring the usual effort into it. I thought that moving into a new house would mean that I would transform into a little Martha Stewart and conjure up all sorts of DIY projects, but life is so hectic. I can't imagine even finding the time to crank out the nursery. It seemed like such a priority a couple of months ago. It was all I thought about. Now that we have the room painted and are awaiting the furniture, it just seems like the scariest task ever.

Tonight, I've been thinking about "what ifs". Like, what if Natalie comes early? I've had a little bit of pain in my side for the last hour or so. While I don't think it signifies a contraction or anything, I know I have reached the "age of viability". If she came now, she would be almost 2 lbs. She would be in the NICU for a bit, but she would survive. We would have NOTHING for her here, save for a few outfits that would swallow her whole. And while she would be at the hospital for a good few weeks, we would have to throw together an emergency baby furnishing operation. As of now, we wouldn't even have a carseat to bring her home in! My baby showers probably won't take place until I'm eight months, so it's a daunting thought!

I could be reading about what I'm supposed to be expecting this week, but I would rather be in the dark about some things. I tend to stress myself out when I look into things. Like, instead of reading all the great information, I look at what could possibly go wrong at each stage. Right now, I have mastered avoidance. I'm sure if you looked at my google history for the first few months of this pregnancy, you'd find some scary things.

For right now, things are progressing and my doctor seems very pleased with how things are going. I have to go back at 28 weeks for a glucose test, but I'm hoping to pass that with flying colors and not be put on a strict diet with finger pricking for the rest of my pregnancy...

Anyhow, going to go clean up. . .

Tired. Hope it snows tonight, though we have church and lunch with new friends that I would hate to miss.